Is this pp or pnd? please help.

[ilovehoney]

Please help me! During my life I have been sexually bullied, raped and had an attempted rape on me, so as I was having a little girl I knew things wouldn't be easy. After the birth I become extremely over protective and could not stand men touching her or even looking at her. I became slightly obsessed at the idea that every man was a pedophile, and that as much as I tried I wouldn't be able to keep her from harm. In the end it got really bad and had images in my head of what those sick perverts do to kids, these images wouldn't stop! It made me feel sick and disgusted and worse still think that I myself was a pedophile for thinking about such things. It's tearing me apart and I feel so messed up. I don't know what to do or where to turn and am so scared she will be taken off me. Please can someone talk to me, tell me what this is.

[peggy]

Hello
Having suffered with pp myself and recovered now feeling 'normal', I would GUESS that you are worried more likely because of your past experiences which must have left some mental scars as they sound very traumatic. But everyone is different and the way they experience pnd or pp is different from one person to another so I would strongly suggest you go and try and tell a doctor about how you are feeling. I dont think you should be hard on yourself though.

Hope you get some help you sound very troubled.

Peggy

[finkitham]

Hi honey, dont worry about thoses thoughts your having they mean nothing about you as a parson it is just your worst fear thus its playing on your mind. I had pp about 4 years ago and i thought everyone, even women where peodophiles and got very agrressive and was severly psychotic. After leaving hospital i still had thoughts simular to yours although my psychosis had gone.It tore me apart and put me close to suicide, but after having the courage to speak up to health proffesionals i found out i had ocd

[finkitham]

and was put on setraline, it had completly changed my life for the better. I think the fact your consious something isnt right you may not have pp, but def go to the doctors to talk, pref thoses specialising in mental health. Stay stron your baby needs his/her mummy! and maybe look up sexual obsessive complusive disorder as it will show you plenty of people who experience simular meaningless thoughts. Goodluck and face your fears, avoiding them will make them stronger, xxx

[ilovehoney]

Thanks I feel more confident to go and speak to a health professional now, I have a camhs appointment soon and cbt, so hopefully things will get better. I'm also on sertraline 50mg but don't feel any effect